So I’m Jason Bittel

I also spend a lot of time leaning against barns in full suits.

And if one of those internet tracking laws ever goes into effect, they’re going to find some freaky stuff on my hard drive.

Not, like, illegal stuff. It’s just that you can’t write an article about scrotums – or even etymology, apparently – without wandering through some of the internet’s Badlands.

When I’m not Bittel Me This-ing, I write fulltime for a branding and advertising agency. I also write for a wine of the month club. Before this, I wrote and edited a fashion magazine. And before that, I trapped and shot Eurasian wild boars for the National Park Service. Thanks to a small grant from the National Geographic Society, I got to spend three years writing about pigs and bears while completing an MFA in Creative Nonfiction.

Go ahead, say it. I’m all over the place.